!

7:59pm: whoa
actually went out and had myself a date this past weekend. met this cute german chick, Mareike, on saturday. gave her a call and made plans for monday, which included:

Air Hockey - got my ass whupped 0_o

yummy italian food - my fav

cartoons - discovered we had similar tastes in cartoons, so she came to my place and we watched aqua teen hunger force


good times :)

2:38am: how to write a R&B hit
simple steps on how to compose an R&B club hit:

1. have phone/cyber sex
example: you look so hot, let me lick your butt.

2. add a repetitive beat
you can emulate this by recording an empty trashcan rolling down some stairs. put in loop, and voila. your beat is done.

3. add chorus
just throw it in randomly, something simple like "girl! i bet your pootie tastes like bubbles! can i touch your boobs?" repeat
it like 5 or 6 times.

this whole process should take like 5 minutes. put it on the radio, and youll be makin the big bucks in no time

1:31pm: a more pyschotic approach to life
was watching one of my favorite movies, american psycho last night, and i think im gonna have a little fun this weekend with a new sort of approach to things. now germans are fairly good with english, though not so much they would know more complicated words very easily. i hope to incorporate the following line this weekend...

"I like to disect girls"

if things go good with that, a bonus would be to include

"im also brutally insane"

im hoping whoever i decide to strike up conversation with, doesnt know the definition of disect. if they ask, ill simply reply "i like to finds out whats on the inside" sounds sweet doesnt it? even if they do know what it means, its sure to make them uncomfortable and i get to watch them squirm to break contact. either way, its sure to entertain me.

in other news, only slightly more than a month before i deploy.

3:10pm: talking dirty to equipment i work on seems to make it work better. i think this stuff likes it rough.

dominant tech. where do you find handcuffs for a 15 meter antenna?

1:36pm: whenever im at work, and see people working on equipment, say a power supply or amplifier or what have you, i always imagine that last screw holding the case intact being loosened, and as the casing clanks to the floor, i picture some timeless horror bursting from said equipment. consequently the tech goes mad as the eldritch entity is unleashed upon the motorpool.

my imagination runs rampant when im bored at work....

12:32am: Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!

3:51am: while i got the free time...
if you want to hear from me whille im deployed, gimme a good email addy, snail mail addy or whatever. leave it here, or just email it to

jonathan.carlson@us.army.mil

or

XSpaceNinjaX@gmail.com

2:52am: its nasty, rainy and cold. kinda reflects my mood.

10:27pm: ive defeated the filter so i can log onto message boards, but i cant post :( still cant get my yahoo or gmail either. i still lose.

8:46am: i had a dream that i was pioneering the west, and battling indian tribes with modern military technology. i was piloting some sort of fighter jet, and mowing down guys on horses. my allies, of course had muskets and other weaponry of the era.

6:53pm: ugh, wish i had some sort of proxy i could use to get around these weird restrictions. got one on my mail account, but i cant even log into gmail to get the link. anyone got any ideas?

4:36am: postsecret
http://postsecret.blogspot.com/

anonymous confessions. reminds me of my own secrets

3:47am: touched by His Noodly Appendage
ive been enlightened.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Flying_Spaghetti_Monster

9:03pm: terr'ist stole my socks
i cant update my LJ more than a sentance or 2. internet access in the field is weird sometimes

1:37am: jh

2:52pm: good times i suppose
went out last night, went dancing, make attempts to be social, etc...

in any sort of social environment including music, alcohol and people there are certain social intereactions that happen. my luck however, is fairly exceptional. i must have a way with words.

girl # 1: dragged off by her friend who then shot me a dirty look. nice.

girl # 2: looked at me like i was raping her mom in front of her

girl # 3: "i hate white guys"

girl # 4: same ol' disgusted look.

so last night was pretty productive. about midway through i started making a game of it. friends would point a girl out and id go introduce myself. a simple hi was enough to send them fleeing for safety. i love people.

10:34am: friday went back to the labrynth. h adnt been there since new years. not a whole lot changed. i recognized an assload, and they all looked more or less the same. i got drunk and watched everyone rock out. i was beat by 3am and had toruble staying up.

went to some reggae festival down in mainz on saturday. not much to see. it was hot as hell out so everyone was chillin in the shade, and it was still mid afternoon so not many people were down there. got some gifts for people. a bandana, a batman sticker (of all the things to find there, batman shit) and a button for me.

went to this club, the A5 the other night. it was an alright place. not nearly the best, but decent. i liked the layout. they had one room set up in a stargate style. egyptian artifacts and all that. the thing the disco ball hung from was really cool too. and also another room with more of a future theme to it. also a 3rd room all piratey and stuff. it was good times. been a while since ive gone out.

about midway through the night, they started this sick light show. all the lights went out in the club, and the had a little countdown, and once done, the place exploded with all kinds of light effects. the best light show ive seen. only thing i really took pictures of that night, but some came out really good. these 2 are my favs.





the rest are here, http://photobucket.com/albums/v217/xspaceninjax/etc/


anyway, getting ready to begin an assload of training till i deploy. starting at about 1am tonight, im out till about the 31st, get a few days back here, then back out to the field for a month. rinse, repeat. i only have about 2 or 3 weeks i wont be in the field till i deploy. theres speculation about more block leave, but thats not for sure. im hoping we get that, though i wont be going home. ill probably go to spain or something.

1:23pm: been a week since i got back, and havent really bothered to write about my vacation. not much to note about it really. just went to visit people, and was just mainly lazy. i thought it was well worht the time though. kinda a mix of feelings about everything however. it was great seeing everyone again, and at the same time i couldnt help but think how much ill miss everyone while im gone. its gonna be a while before i see anyone again =\

going back to gloucester was cool. that place always feels like home when im there. probably cause ive lived there so long. saw some family, bill, and jeremy (though only real briefly), and just kinda wandered around reminiscing. took a few pictures, ill post em below. was supposed to visit lori, but stuff got botched up. my lack of wheels made making plans rather difficult, ah well =\

from there i flew out to colorado. with some minor air mishaps around atlanta, involving my plane hitting massive turbulence. the sudden drops were fun i assure you. it was a bit weird out there. though they all had a lot of stuff going on, and most of em work at night. they were up and about while i was struggling unsuccesfully to stay awake. i would kinda lapse in and out of consciousness and say hey on occasion. i enjoyed my time out there, though i couldnt help but feel like something was off. i dunno, like i said it was just a weird time to go out there.

then off to florida, to visit my parents. again my friends were working a lot so i spent a lot of time just being lazy around the house. i didnt plan to do a whole lot so that was just fine by me. i managed to get out towards the beach near sunset while everyone was away. i love going down to the beach late evening and just kicking back. real relaxing. also got a couple pictures though one came out sorta blurry.



( More Pictures )

the rest of the pictures are here. enjoy.

http://photobucket.com/albums/v217/xspaceninjax/etc/?start=0


***EDIT***
also got a new tattoo. behold :D

4:25pm: Return of The Zombie! part 1
in 8 hours, the longest day ever begins. well..more like 13-14 hours, or whenever the sun comes up. anyway, ill be on my way home tomorrow. my flight leave around 1pm, and ill arrive in boston about 5:30pm. more than enough time to get to my grandparents place, grab something to eat and go hunt everyone down. unlike other trips, i think only a few people know im coming back this time. not that i havent tried, but im sure people havent answeed my calls on occasion due to strange numbers on the caller ID. no matter, im excited to go back and itll be great to see everyone. hope i dont wear myself out too much so i can get up early saturday and head to boston and chill with Lori. should be many photo ops, and ill try to update here as much as possible, or care to. in the mean time, Salad Fingers!

5:44pm: im stuck at work. have to live in this building till wednesday. fear i may have to eat co-workers to survive....

glad i brought the ketchup

10:50am: an american zombie in paris
found a wi-fi spot, so im taking this opportunity to upload what pics i have for now. once everyone gets up, going back out. gonna go see notre dame today, and some huge castle. might go back into the louvre again...that place is huge!

http://photobucket.com/albums/v217/xspaceninjax/paris/

2:52pm: vacation news!
about my leave coming up in june, looks like i might go with flying into boston from germany, so i should be there on the 17th, through about the 21st or 22nd, from there i venture to colorado from the 23rd to the 27th and then to florida from the 28th, to the 3rd, then finall back to boston to make my flight back to germany. sadly it looks like i may have to pass on a visit to MD. i just dont have the cash at the moment, or the amount of leave i thought i would have for vacation. however theres talk of giving us another block leave segment in late october, but nothing is set just yet.

$700 for roundtrip ticket to boston
$139 from boston to denver
$139 from denver to west palm beach
$89 from orlando back to boston

not too shabby....

2:13pm: gonna go to paris this weekend. it feels kinda strange to just go there on a whim. should be fun though, even with all the french. hopefully i can find some wi-fi spots and upload pics and junk while im out there. ill write about my little adventure next week when im back

12:58pm: been meaning to update for a while. some big stuff coming up. hopefully i get something up here soon...but for now, some more random pictures

http://photobucket.com/albums/v217/xspaceninjax/lomos/

those are from the other night mostly. my friend brian was spinning at this little club called lomos. and others are tags from throughout the city, etc... enjoy

10:16pm: ever have one of those moments you think your whole life your living might be a dream? or nightmare if you look at it that way?

last night i had this dream that seemed so real i could have sworn it was reality. well..up untill i wound up butt nekkid in a horse stable in pitch darkness...but during this dream i lived a life completly different from my own...some of the locaions where the same though. it was like a complete day...even went to sleep in this dream, had another dream about smething else that woke me up in the middle of the night. it was the middle of winter because i remember it snowing, but i went out and basicly wound up naked in the horse stable waiting for this girl i knew...thats about where i had my "what the fuck?" moment and woke up...when i didn wake up though it took about 20 minutes to remember where i was, why i was there and who the people around me were. id have to say it was one of the stranger moments in my life.